You know what? I have been wasting away since I got out of high school. When I was a junior, I had seriously high hopes for the future. I was at the top of my class and at the top of the world. I was active in several extracurricular activities as well as in national honor society. The summer before my senior year basically changed everything. I changed my circle of friends and my long lost love returned from juvie. I had a bad boy complex and he filled every last bit of criteria for the bad boy. Not too long afterwards I got pregnant. Its not that I gave up on my dreams immediately because I did attend college for a year after high school. After I dropped out, my lust for learning went completely down and I resigned to just doing what I could to make money. I have had so many jobs since I graduated that I have lost count. And not one of them has paid enough to really support my family. Its funny too, because I have been heard saying that things would be so much easier if I only had another income to help with the bills. Not true. I struggle just as much with him here.
It is a sad day when you sit back and realize that you have given up on your dreams. I wanted to be something when I grew up. I wanted to be someone important in the community. I wanted to be a lawyer or a nurse or a teacher. Someone who made a difference in others lives. I know, though, that even though, I did not make a difference in the lives of many. I have my children, so I have made a difference in the lives of a few. And its never too late to go back to school, you know? Although it is extremely difficult with three small children and a full time job. Hmmmm.....maybe I didn't give up on my dreams, maybe I just created new ones. And if that's what I have done then I am currently living the dream.
No, money doesn't buy happiness, but love sure as hell does.
Peace and Love
Crystal Robinson
Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from Crystals BlackBerry®
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